One of the things I did while back in OZ was do all of those downloads that are just too painful to do here. I knew there was a reasonable chance I could bludge off one of my hosts (ie the multiple households I bludged off while away), but the first crack I had was at an internet cafe with super-fast broadband.
I had a large list of bits and pieces to download (eg software updates, Windows patches etc.) and I blitzed through that list in next to no time. I was actually gob-smacked at how quick it was.
So instead of growing older doing big stuff via dial-up here, I decided to hit a few big downloads (funny how Windows updates always seems to be on the list) at a Dili internet cafe. I had forgotten that there is broadband and there is not broadband.
At the 1st internet cafe (US$6 per hour), I was slowly crunching my way through when a squad of OZ troops bowled in and bam, everything hit the wall. Initially, throughput slowed then my system complained that someone else had nabbed my IP address so internet traffic stopped. I tried to complain but got nowhere so left. I moved onto another internet cafe (US$4 per hour) and after 5 minutes, the Microsoft update server had still not responded. There was muttering around me suggesting that throughput had ceased. I packed up and left, concluding that my dial-up was faster than this anyway.
So I go home and find someone has sent me a huge (apparently) amusing email with pictures. I think I aged 5 years after all of this.